Treat Yo Self

2:19 PM

    It's here. It's come. Every year on February 14th the madness begins. Singles get grumpier, couples get haughtier, and everyone else just tries to get out of dodge. This morning, while reading a post about how couples basically need to get off their high horses and stop pitying singles because we're JUST FINE!!!! I had to laugh. Since when was being single so bad? Admittedly, Valentine's Day has never affected me like it has my other single friends. I've never really felt alone on that day. Every year when I was visiting my parent's over Valentines, I would wake up to a candy heart from my dad. It was always such a nice tradition. However, New Year's Eve sitting alone watching the ball drop on television because the rest of your family has already gone to bed, has always been the depressing highlight of my calender. 


     Honestly, I've only been with somebody one Valentine's and it was pretty dang awkward. The morning of, it completely slipped my mind that it was V-day. My then boyfriend, was not so fortunate. In a moment of sheer self disgust, he looked at me, started laughing nervously, and pulled something out from behind his back. It was a misshapen stuffed heart with my name embroidered sappily across the front of it. In a state of utter confusion at what could have possessed him to give me such an atrocity, I attempted my best well-look-at-that-aren't-you-sweet smile. Then for a moment, we just sat there looking at the thing sitting between us, almost wishing away its sad existence. We gave each other an awkward hug and went about our day. Don't get me wrong, he was a great guy, and it was very thoughtful that he even remembered. However, our relationship was fairly new, so I believe I hid myself in a bathroom stifling laughter for the next ten minutes. 


     Singles have long attempted to recreate some of the magic couples are supposed to share on this day of love. Some people celebrate "Galentines Day," while others simply stuff their faces with inexpensive chocolate while yelling at rom-coms. Whatever floats your boat, I say. I know being single can be depressing. We all have our moments, and for a lot of people those doubts resurface, like Old Faithful, every February the 14th. Those moments will come and some days will be hard. I have three friends who've had a baby within this last week. It's madness! And it does make you check the time on your biological clock. But really, single life is so awesome. And yes, I am saying this to make you feel better. I have a lot of married friends, and most times I don't envy their lives because I'm not there yet. God gives you grace for whatever season you're in and there is a grace to be single. Make plans while you're single. Travel the world. Enjoy not having to run every decision past someone else. Focus on your friendships. 


     People often discount friendships as if they weren't of much value. My best friends live on several continents. They are fascinating people with fantastic lives. They run hard after God and live amazing adventures. They are truly book worthy and they're always there for me. They have seen me cry my eyes out when something bad has happened and they've been my biggest supporters during one of my many wild moves. They pray for me, send me voxers, write me little notes, and even send me packages with gifts from across the world. And frankly, I would never have invested in them as much if I was in a relationship with a guy. Because....we do that. We leave all for the sake of the one. There is a time and a place for that and most of us will have at least one epic romance in our lives. If you're like me, you look forward to that even more, because you're aware of what life is like without it.  So, dream about your future. Dream about the places you want to go with "the one." Dream about your wedding day, or having your first kid together, or going on an epic honeymoon in the Bahamas. I take a lot of stock in dreams because God has allowed so many of mine to come true. We serve the dream-maker, the God of long forgotten hopes, the ultimate lover, and the friend who hears our heartbeats even when we forget we're alive. He's got this. You'll be okay. You will survive this Valentine's Day like you did the last. 


      Holidays are great. They break up the mundane. They celebrate both the absurd and the meaningful. They give us a great excuse to eat chocolate, or shamrock shakes, or marshmallows in the shape of barnyard animals entirely covered in colored sugar. So, here's my advice for this day and for you. Create a tradition. Every Valentine's do something you love to do. Start this year and just enjoy yourself! Watch the Notebook guiltily, or go to the beach. Eat something atrocious for your diet but delectable to your soul. Have a worship night with God. Throw old fish at happy couples. In the inestimably great words of the characters of "Parks and Recreation." 

images via buzzfeed,, and yours truly

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